Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Going back into lockup

It looks like the break is over. I was denied for the first time since September, and it may lead to more D/s play. Last night, my wife and I started fooling around, and one thing led to another. The kissing turned into making out, and then became me going down on her. I didn't take her panties off, but I slid them to the side, exposing her beautiful pussy. While I worshipped between her legs, I became hard as a rock, and was nearly fighting off an accident of my own. Soon she was cumming. After that came the talk I have had many times before.

"I want you to fuck me. Can you fuck me?" she asked. "See how much I want you?", she said as we both noticed how drenched she was.

I told her that I was really close to cumming and was going to shoot in her quickly. I asked her if that was ok. She thought about it for a second. Even though she has been telling me to go ahead lately, she changed directions and mentioned how it probably wouldn't be worth it. She slipped the crotch of her panties back into place.

"I think I'll make you wait awhile." she said, and also added that our weekend getaway was in a few weeks and she'd like me to be really horny and attentive until then. If that wasn't enough, she added that I wasn't really doing a good job fucking her anyway.

So it turns out that some of the things on my mind these last few weeks were also of some significance to her. It was good to know that we were both on the same page when it came to playing again. Even though I could have exploded into a hot wet pussy if I would have just kept my mouth shut, things seemed right.

By the way, the pic is not me, nor is it the device I use. But it is a good image of what is to come.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Keeping a Release Calender for Chastity

I started keeping a calender of every time I get to release. I did this a couple of years ago but never stuck with it. I started this new one in mid September and it is interesting to see how my body reacts and the trends that form during different periods of denial. I include the time of day, the type of sex, with or without a condom, and how long I lasted. I can also add the times my wife has sex with a real man and how long he lasts to make interesting comparisons.

As I stated before, we haven't been playing much at all, but I have not been getting enough release to make sex much different. I've noticed that since I've started keeping record on this calender, I've really only been inside of my wife for a total of about two minutes. It's amazing to think how far I've fallen in terms of sexual performance and inability even without being put in chastity. It will also be interesting to make a final tally for the year and compare it to how many times you'd think your average healthy male releases. Anyway, I just thought I'd pass this along as an idea for anyone into chastity play.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Forced Vanilla

A little over a month ago, I was preparing myself for a significant amount of chastity, service, and cuckolding. Due to unforeseen events, all things were put on hold. But this isn't turning out to be a typical break from the kink where I have regular sex with my wife, frequent orgasms, and a mind clear of the horny thoughts that occupy my attention. Instead, this is becoming a mixture of no play and no release. This area of limbo is proving to be the worst.

When we are in the midst of our Femdom games, the feeling of denial is bearable because there is no expectation of me being the provider of good sex. It is accompanied by verbal torment of my pathetic attempt at intercourse, which makes the game more fun for us. But once my wife is done dominating and denying me for awhile, we have sex about three times during the weekend and things go back to a more vanilla marriage.

The difference this time is that we haven't had enough time to have sex so frequently. We have only had sex about once every couple of weeks, clearly not enough times to curb my appetite for sex. I'm still very horny but there is no outlet for my kinky submissive tendencies right now. I wish very much to put on panties and lick my wife's shoes, but we are not in Femdom mode. I wish to talk with my wife about the sex she has with her boyfriend, but there has been no recent encounter and may not be for quite some time. I wish I could either fuck her the right way or be locked up and denied that right because these twenty second fuck sessions aren't really rocking her world either.

We are planning a weekend getaway soon. I hope she lets me indulge in some of the service oriented play. But until then, it is a hard road to travel for someone with horny kinky thoughts and no outlet.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

A Great Cuckold Website

I feel the need to tell everyone about a very good cuckold website that I found. Actually, I used to frequent the original website, fmsb.org, back before I went ahead with telling my wife of my fantasies. It was very informative and I learned a lot that would help me go forth with a cuckold marriage. The website's owner, Luvr, has somewhat revamped it. The website is now cuckoldmarriage.info, and when I found it recently, I was amazed by how much it had grown in content.


Often when trying to convey my thoughts on certain issues, I still feel that I can't get the point I'm trying to make come across they way I want. Though I think I did a decent job in my post 'Why Sissify?', Luvr hit the nail on the head with his article 'The Pantied Cuckold'. Here is an excerpt from the article that really caught my attention.

For some couples, the journey to cuckolding begins first with an exploration of the husband’s submission. Being that male ego is so closely tied to his genitals, they are the most effective path to his submission. Panties are such an outwardly physical sign of femininity that they have long been used to reflect shame on men by implying they’re wearing them when one chooses to criticize a male for less than masculine behavior. The natural thing, then, to deepen a male’s submission is to actually panty him.

This is a good explanation of where I stand on the issue of why I love the idea of a man wearing women's panties, and why I like wearing women's panties. There are many other articles that do a great job of explaining some of the more questionable behaviors by otherwise normal, heterosexual males. I highly recommend this site to anyone who is interested in any aspect of cuckolding.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

When you have to put the kinky games to the side

It has been awhile since I updated. Besides being a little busy, there was something else that changed the situation I left you with on the last post. My wife and I got into a serious argument. I won't go into the details, but it was so serious that the Femdom thing had to be put on hold. We have since reconciled and have no hard feelings towards each other.

Every marriage is different, but I think a good all marriages need to focus on the important things when times are tough. I may be consumed with the idea that I live to please my wife in any submissive way possible, but rough times like the one we went through prove that our kinky sexual adventures are just games we play in the grand scheme of things. So after a week of tension between us, things got progressively better until we had that talk which really settled things. That is when the makeup sex came into play.

I knew that I could not portray the submissive bitch boy who left her wanting a little more if I was to have real makeup sex. It was going to be difficult since my orgasms had been rationed, but I knew that she needed me to step up and be a man for her. What I lacked in stamina, I made up for with my fingers and overall sexual prowess. I turned her around and I worked my fingers like a pornstar's cock and she really loved it. She even took to my slapping her ass and pulling her hair. She came extremely hard. Then I buried my own dick in and fucked until I exploded. She was really satisfied and made sure I knew how great it had been. We did it again later that day. I still hadn't gained my stamina back since it was still one orgasm for me in two weeks, But we had a lot of fun with it, and it seemed to bring us very close again as a couple.

This is obviously not for all couples. There are 24/7 Femdom couples that don't consider their roles in the marriage just a game. But I think the majority of married couples who practice this dynamic do have to put the "extras" on the back burner when they really need each other.

I'm not sure how long our games will be on hold. She may want me to be a man for her for quite some time, or things may get kinky really soon. But I will try to keep the blog fresh with more of my thoughts no matter what.