For me, nothing slows a mood down faster than the cold, dreary season of winter. The hustle and bustle of the holidays doesn't help either. There is just no time to think about the sexy things in life. Maybe I should start with where I left on in my last entry.
I was on a four week bout of chastity and horny as ever. The anticipation and pent up frustration was to finally meet its destination in the form of our weekend getaway. And yes, it did happen. My wife and I got a hotel room downtown near the nightlife.
The plan was for us to have some drinks, she would flirt around a little, and we would see where things went from there. So we went to some of the known establishments. She tried to find some guys she liked. She did converse with one or two guys, but the vibe just wasn't there. Anything more would have seemed like forcing the issue. We decided after awhile that it was time to go back to the room and make our own fun.
When we got there, she sat on the bed and told me to remove her boots and socks. Once I did that, I did what came naturally for a sub with four weeks of denial and started licking. I licked and slurped on her feet like a desperate dog trying to gain acceptance from his owner. She smiled the whole time, and once I felt she'd had enough of my worship, we both got into more sexy attire. I wore a lacy white thong and she wore a black push-up bra with matching boy shorts. We ordered some porn on the tv and as she laid down on the bed, I took my place on the floor beside her.
As we watched the big dicked studs plow into the horny women on the screen, it was evident how turned on she was by her wetness and how she pulled me into bed with her. I fingered her while she watched the fucking. It was the only way to simulate the adult movie since my penis was ready to explode at the slightest caress. With my fingers, I could control things, and as the guy on the screen had the woman doggy style, slapping her ass, I was slapping hers. She loved it. She loved how I teased her clit, prolonging the pleasure. She was being treated like a slut while my penis stood by idly. It was the next best thing to her actually getting fucked by another man. It was followed by her intense and well built up orgasm.
When it was finally my turn to release, the mood wasn't as intense. We both knew that I was going to cum upon entry, which I did. For me it was quick, not satisfying, and she didn't even take her bra off. The next morning, we went at it and I was still too sensitive to perform any kind of rhythm, so mostly I just kept myself inside of her while fingering her clit. She still didn't let me see her naked breasts because she knew I would cum even faster. Still, I came before I could get her off, and ended up finishing her with my mouth on her clit while tasting my own cum. And finally, later on that day, we had sex for a third time. I fucked her doggy style and lasted about thirty seconds.
It is truly a great physical feeling to have three releases inside the woman you love and worship. And there was some kinky play and submission, like me wearing panties, being denied the sight of my wife's big tits the entire weekend, and the humiliation of my feeble attempts at fucking. Many, many men would have loved to trade places with me. Still, I can't help but compare things to our most intense sexual exploits. One weekend getaway in particular comes to mind when she shoved a huge realistic dildo down my throat, slapping me in the face while telling me how pathetic my dick is, all before fucking the dildo and telling me how much better "he" is before finally orgasming on it. There were numerous times like that in the past which were just as intense, but we don't seem to be doing that anymore.
Maybe my wife feels that by actually cuckolding me as she did, she has taken "the game" far enough for me, as if to say she has already done her part, and none of this is about her. As much enthusiasm as she has taken when playing over the years, I still worry that this may be true. Or maybe it is really just the dull mood of the dreary winter.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
At the expense of sounding too straightforward with this, I just have to say that my balls are SO full. I am as horny as ever today. I can't believe I have at least ten days to go before I am allowed to ejaculate. Sometimes I think my sex drive is just too high to practice chastity.
Some people are naturally submissive in the most extreme sense. For me, that only happens after I am denied my primal urge to come for extended periods of time. I turn into a different person. After an amount of denial, it isn't about fucking and getting my rocks off anymore. It becomes about serving. The want to feel the pussy on my dick is replaced by the want to smell and taste it. The desire to hold her naked breasts, suck on them, and fuck them is replaced by the arousal of being denied their sight and feel, teased by mere cleavage, redirected to licking her sweaty feet instead. Even most of my erections are replaced by wet spots (don't ask me how that happens, but after long term denial, my penis somehow conditions itself to stay soft and leak precum to deal with arousal).
All I want to do is be a good little bitch for my beautiful wife. My mind is clouded all day with many various fantasies. From cuckolding to being a sissy cock sucker, from role play to cbt, the scenarios flood my imagination.
I even thought about writing an imaginary letter to my wife, pretending she is my mommy and telling her how much of a good boy I've been and how I would make sure to pick up all of my toys and do my chores while she and daddy are on their date. Then being made to go to bed early by my bratty 18 year old babysitter, so she can have her boyfriend over,
You get the picture. The vanilla me is locked away for now, just as subsequent as my penis is locked in chastity. My only outlet is to be a better helper for my wife, and to give better massages, which only intensifies everything. This is Hell. But this is Heaven.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Last night started out like any other Friday night where you have drinks and retire to the bedroom with a little buzz and feel like having some fun. Not that it is the case every Friday night, but you get my drift. My wife and I started making out to kick off the inevitable oral worship she would receive. But the whole time, I was having trouble letting her touch my penis for fear of having an accident. She loves touching me and feeling how hard I get for her. I'm guessing it was quite a letdown for her that she could not stroke me and feel like she was in bed with a capable man. Still, my oral skills kept things at bay, and I satisfied her otherwise.
After her orgasm, we cuddled and kissed a little more. As we made small talk, she mentioned how she couldn't believe how excited I've been getting. I agreed with her. Then she told me that maybe I should be locked up until I get to cum. That she didn't want to risk me having a wet dream or accident during this time. To be honest, I quickly agreed since I hadn't been under such control in awhile and was curious to experience it again. But of course, that was also because I was hard as a rock and being controlled sounds best at that time.
I pulled out my CB3000 from its box in the closet. At that moment I realized just how long it has been. My wife hasn't been with her fuck buddy in months, and the last time I took it off was after she came back from meeting him. It still had the ksd-g2 in place. For those who don't know, the ksd stands for keepsake device, and it is an insert that is supposed to prevent you from pulling out. Now everyone who is familiar with chastity devices knows that the CB series is not escape proof no matter what you do. But this is one added measure that will do a bit of damage to your penis if you pull it out. I like having that extra safeguard. Anyway, I locked it in place and that feeling of helplessness on my still aroused but softening penis brought back that old and familiar feeling of submission, especially when I put the key on her nightstand.
For the next two weeks, I will only be out of my cage during showers and also at work. This isn't Fort Knox by any means, but some circumstances just don't allow me to wear it 24/7. Which is fine, because it contributes to the fact that I have had this device for at least six years and it is still intact (hopefully I didn't jinx it). Otherwise, I will feel this mass of plastic between my legs at home and out with friends. As I sit and type this today, the absolute need to be locked up like this feels a bit premature. Now that I am not at full mast with my hot wife staring down at me, the regrets are there. But overall I am glad she wants this for me. We both know how much better I am as a husband when my hormone levels are bouncing off the ceiling yet kept in check under lock and key.