Thursday, November 14, 2013

You think you communicate with your significant other? Communicate some more

This past weekend was great in terms of intimacy with the wife. We had sex three nights in a row. Well, technically, I got my wife off three nights in a row but we didn't have intercourse. In fact, I didn't get to orgasm at all. But what was so great about it was that we finally got a lot of time to play. This was unusual.

Now I have mentioned in the past that my wife and I are not perfect for each other sexually. She loves having an attentive husband, but also likes to get fucked hard from time to time. I like a dominant wife in bed who isn't afraid to treat her hubby like the sissy he is and seek other, more able men for her raw sexual gratification. But even though we aren't a perfect match, the fact of the matter is that sex isn't everything when it comes to a marriage. Yes, it is a very important thing, but there are other very important things that make a marriage tick as well. So in bed, all we can do is be the best we can for each other.

I often get too caught up in wishing for more dominance from my wife, as well as more initiative on her part to engage in extra-marital activities. But, like this past weekend, sometimes I am reminded that the key to my greatest kinks are right in front of me. I can honestly say that my fantasies cannot compare to the arousal I've experienced at the hands of my wife personally. Sure, these real-time experiences are few and far between the plethora of filthy thoughts I have almost every waking moment of the day. But when my wife is on, as they say, and real experiences are had, I don't even think about the fantasy stuff.

Working towards my goal of taking a more proactive role, I reminded my wife of the kinks this weekend. Knowing that she had heard me say this many times before, I continued to drive home what I loved about being her submissive. I mentioned how ejaculating feels better physically but doesn't give me the mental and full body high that being denied does. I told her how much I loved handing over ownership of my penis to her. I even had a candid but in no way suggestive conversation about my already known ideal scenarios in bed (denying me forever and turning me into a massage boy only, etc.). I knew that communication was always the key.

My wife wanted to reward me for pleasuring her so well by unlocking me for the night to sleep better. It showed that even though I think I have shown her what I like about the lifestyle, she still doesn't completely understand how much I do. I told her that the best reward for me is for her to keep her toy locked because it isn't mine. She gave a somewhat surprised and excited ok, and I reiterated to her that I really needed her to own this penis between my legs. I told her how wet my panties get when she is selfish and puts me in my place. And she gave the pleasantly surprised look like she always gives and tells me she has it too good. I thought she already knew this about me.

My wife and I have been playing the Femdom and chastity games for nearly a decade now. During this time, we have talked about our desires in bed what I would consider a great deal. But I'm learning that you can never stop communicating and must always reassure each other that you are both still in this thing 100%. It may seem redundant, but continuing to discuss in detail the specifics of what you love about sex and the kinky lifestyle in general will remind your partner of some of the things that eventually fall by the wayside. You might worry that you may be topping from the bottom, just as I do. But when I find that my wife considers these confessions of submission a gift, I know that I'm only helping her understand me better.

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